i'm fighting back against my will. since the beginning of term 3, i realised i have been losing my concentration. the moment i open my book for revision, i cant help but lie in bed and fall asleep. what is worse is that i cant even take a short nap. i could only lie in bed reflecting over and over again why i cant seem to study for even a brief 30 minutes. i just flipped and skimmed through the science topics but i cant absorb anything at all. did some questions. though i get all correct, i wasnt satisfied. i know i did it through sheer "luck". give me one more day and i'm sure all that i had studied for is gone. i dont know why. i have been telling my aunt regarding this matter but there doesnt seem to have an end to this. i'm sick and tired of this. why do we have to study? sighs. still holiday-mood. closed my eyes and ruminate. i know i'm lagging, rotting, decomposing. but i dont care... i cant put a stop to this anymore. common test's next week and i cant afford to perform well below expectations. but i sense i will. i feel like drowning my sorrow in my sleep but i just cant. suffering from insomnia. haha. i have had enough of it.

'when the end comes you just cant start all over again.