My Opprobious Behavior

I feel so lousy. I should have known actually. Anyway, the morning was fine. There was drama classes accompanied by a check-up on our performance. Chinese Oral was conducted in the afternoon. And not forgetting, there was the collection of report books too.

Everything started going wrong towards the end of the day, after the subject combination talk, however. Was chafed at by this teacher, whom I'll call Teacher A over here. It was basically over my selfishness and irresponsibility. So I told Teacher A that I ain't free and all that sort of stuff. I'm not sure why, but maybe it's due to all the last-minute rush that teacher A then was feeling really frustrated and piqued and hence, railed at me and seemed to misinterpret my statement. Said I hadn't been attending rehearsals and all that kind of things you'd expect to hear in a dressing down. Why the hell man, I'm informed of everything at the very last moment and now I get blamed for all this crap. When all else was falling out of place, disorganised, I tried my best to put things right again and again. Yes, I do admit that I'm being very self-centred when I left very suddenly without a word. It's kind of evident that I was sad. Sad for being so impolite and taking my leave and most of all, sad for my overall conduct. But that's not the main thing I wanna gripe about. This teacher A then began to spat all the harsh remarks at me. I wanted to explain myself, but I guess no matter what I say, it will just be some kind of meaningless statement to you so long as I'm STILL gonna strut off away. I think I landed this friend of mine, Z, in a very binding spot. This afternoon, Z apologises for not carrying out his duties and stuff. I just brushed him off, thinking it's nothing. In the end, I left Z alone to see to this evening's event. I should be the one who feels sorry. For leaving him stranded and having to bear with any scoldings from teacher A, should there be any. I ought to be ashamed of myself. But in the wave of fury, I just wanted to get myself out of the school compounds as soon as possible, and thus, Z's the only one pulling the strings behind everything. But if given a chance, I'll still be offering all of you guys a 'sorry'. I'm calling it quits because I'm stupid. Stupid to get angry over that slight remark of teacher A, to be in a helpless state at that time.

Misunderstood.

Other than this, the day's relatively good. =DDD

Saturday Sprayed With Enjoyment

I'm finally back home after a long day out. Feel all so haggled. Aching all over. Played a game of English Chess with my brother in the early morning till around 10 plus before Mum started to badger at us both to take our breakfast. So finished a round of game and I turned out to be the loser. Can't blame me cuz I'm still a greenhorn who just mastered the game today. Lack of strategy contributes to my losing too. Anyway, my brother says he's still an amateur cuz he just picked up the game from his friends yesterday. One comical thing during the game was when he explained to me the different movement the chess pieces are supposed to make. There was this 'Pawn' seed. Pronunciation is almost similar to the word 'Porn'. My brother made me repeat after him the many names of the chess pieces. My favourite piece is the 'Knight'. One that almost resembles a seahorse. Cool. They played English Chess in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone too. I'm gonna take after them. Muhaha.

Left the house slightly after 12 to meet Amelia, Cheryl and Melissa at Plaza Singapura for the movie HairSpray. A musical show just like the High School Musical except this is less hip and the setting's in the 60s. Gets a rating of 3 out of 5. Yes, I love the music and lyrics for the songs but still I'd very much prefer something like King Kong, Harry Potter or Spiderman. They have much more unprecedented scenes which other movies haven't featured before. And if you're talking about romance show then I think the best I've ever watched is Just Like Heaven. Had lunch at the foodcourt around 4 plus after which we headed over to Bugis Junction especially to take neoprints.

Batted around Bugis Junction for some time before leaving at after 8. Nice weekend generally. Phew, at least for now, staying at home is still the best cuz I'm too tired. Might be playing another game of english chess with bro should there be enough time later on.

You-Know-It Day

Today is just marvelous. Morning was great. Afternoon was amazing and the evening, simply brilliant, Period. Anyway, I was rather puzzled by the gift Sis bought for me yesterday. Kinda cool, I'd say. She woke up this morning at 5 especially to tell me about what she has gotten for me. So that makes my most beautiful word of the day to be a 'thanks'.

School was normal. No extrardinary things or whatsoever. Unless you're talking about my bruised hands. Thanks to Cheryl, Angsiang and Julius. There are these tiny red spots like chicken pox on my hands right now. The left one is recovering fast and the dots are healing but not the 2 tight smacks given by Angsiang and Julius on the left hand.

After school was red cross practice. I've been told that the Outdoor Adventure camp has been defered to the 3rd week of next month and will not be stretched over the September holidays no more. The day after the 3rd week is a schooling day which makes it all the more unfavourable for something like a camp to take place.

On the way home, Angsiang was telling me how fast 1 and a half year has passed. And I was thinking how true that is. One year back I was constantly skipping practices and never bothered to even attend them. Next year on this day, I'm sitting right here, just after redcross practice. How wonderful. I'm not really sure of the remedy which set my mind positive about things again but the one thing definite and indisputable is that something inside me's guiding me through the decision-making and stuff. I just want to ensure that at the end of the day, everything that has happened is due to sensible and wise choices.

Before I go, I just wanna tell everyone this : I'm 14 years and 6 months old! I know that's lame but still... 6 more months to go and I'll turn 15! HAHA! xDDDD

Choices, Life and Everything

Living through everything is just like a going through a trance. I find myself, everyday, hoping against hope that the day will start off and end off well. I'm always going about things the usual way, under the pretext of normality, being happy and no other stuff except carrying myself well. It's just so damn tough. Because I'm so conscious of how I behave on the outside that I realised I neglected how I should counter all the problems i'm really facing.

And it seems like misunderstandings have somehow become a part of every day's living. I woke up early this morning, all set to go to school and there again, something between my aunt and I popped and we started to wrangle. And of course I felt miffed with her. But decided to not prolong the argument lest things go out of hand. To be frank, I've never won any spats with my family.

School was better. Last day of the Common Test which ends with the Home Eco paper. Great enough. Term's nearly up which means September holidays is on the horizon. It's gonna be a busy holiday week cuz i'm supposed to go for this Outdoors Adventure Silver camp which lasts for like 2 days. And another day of camp with some SPI people coming to the school. I'm supposed to have 2 camps but it seems my schedules are all clashed so I'm attending a day plus a day camp. And which finally means I've only got 2 days off from the week-long break.

Gotta stop here and go finish up on my higher mother tongue essay. I'll end the day with some light reading or something near to that. Movies?

Time Crisis. It won't hurt to stay. I swear.

In The Doldrums And Cowardice

Today has been quite an uneventful day. Woke up bright and early and came to school in a rather sprightly mood before the science results totally squashed the shit out of me. I got 31.5 out of 50 which is like a B4. Now that I'd mentioned it, I just realised that I fall below the MSG of B3. Maybe I shouldn't have spent days preparing for Science if I were to know this downfall is coming. Anyway, I felt damn fucked up throughout the day. Tried very hard to suppress this sadness within me. Really, what more can I do besides living with it? After break, things got a little better but still I was overwhelmed with morose feels. Damn. Chinese results were okay, I managed a 38 over 50. One mark above the A1 benchmark.

The real blow of the day was during the Maths Test which was during the last period of the day. Did the paper without much difficulties. After finishing, I got down to checking my work and begin scribbling below the graph paper double-checking my statements, etc. I think I somehow made a mistake in my checking and thought that the workings I have written for a particular question were wrong. Corrected it and midway through I discovered that my previous answers were the right ones. Then time's out and the question's all screwed badly. And the whole day was as glum...

Immmediately after reaching home, I headed into the bedroom and sprawled onto the bed. Sensation was downright loathsome. I really hate everything. Why does all go wrong at the end of the week and when one of the most weighty subs has ended? Come to think of it, if all goes well, then I would be celebrating and enjoying the weekends ahead. BUT THIS DAMNABLE THING, OF ALL TIMES, HAPPENED. Just what the hell did I do to find myself in such a situation?!!!!! The Maths paper riled my anger up badly. I should have confidence in my answers in the first place instead of casting doubts on them. Once, my brother told me to hold faith in my own doings and not worry about things too much. But I guess, I overlooked this advice.

Then during the evening, when my aunt was sitting beside me in the living room sofa, she asked me why my eyes looked swollen as though they are puffing up. I just awoke from my sleep and having to tell her about the science results dampened my spirits real much, especially just RIGHT AFTER I ESCAPED FROM THE PAINS BY SLEEPING! Told her about the science results and she thought that it would be better to let things be the way they are. One interesting thing during the conversation was that my aunt drew a comparison between sis and me. Okay, of course, sis copes better with bad stuffs that happen to her cuz she knows what matters to her and what doesnt. I don't wanna talk too much about this cuz it sounds stupid and the rest of the post above already seems so.

lets hope the grey clouds will dissipate soon. Many a time I'd wanted to ask, but every now and then, I just brushed things aside, all craven.

Pitch, pitches and pitching

Yo I'm back for the day! Guess what, just some minutes ago I actually played on the guitar. Anyway, I was revising for science midway and wanted to find out about the pitches the guitar produces with the different tensions. So off I went to the place where my brother stores his musical instruments. Took me quite some time to spot the guitar cuz it was cloaked in an army design casing, and it was resting against his bike. Strung a few notes away. I tried my best to play a piece of music which my brother taught me some months back but couldn't get it right. And so I went ahead with my experimenting. Asked for mum's assistance cuz I thought having a second pair of ears around would yield a far better and accurate result. I know this is lame but curiosity got the better of me and somehow, I could not yank off this urge to play the guitar.

O, the main thing I wanna tell you guys is : the guitar is such an uncool instrument (to me) cuz the body seems to be so big and you feel kinda uncomfortable to have something chested in front of you. No wonder my brother leaves the guitar in one corner, always in a putrid state.

Man, perhaps me, the born musician should flaunt my talents some time soon!

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Pre-National Day Fete

National Day celebrations. Well, every thing was kept simple and tidy with no elaborated decorations or performances. Now that I'd mentioned about decorations, I realised that there isn't any triangular colour flags bedecking the different floors of the school building this year. Guess the school is trying to scrimp down on budget and manpower. Actually, there aren't that many booths being set up this year. As far as I can recall, last year's food fair even had some stalls stationed on the upper floors. Then there's our class stall selling bandung and chinchow. Sales were brisk, I'd say, considering we are only handling drinks and no other snacks. My coupons were reserved for the chocolate fondue, chocolate muffins, chocolate cookies, chinchow and some pastries. Nothing as sapid as a chocolate foody treat. The Chinchow was more than worth the money cuz I kept refilling it time and again after I finished drinking or when I feel thirsty. I think it is people like me who go around being a free-loader that some businesses have folded. Hahaha. But nevertheless it was still fun. Fun manning the stalls, doodling around and doing nothing but just standing and sitting and walking and nothing else.

Next big thing for this year's celebration was the auction. Though neither melissa, amelia nor me bought anything. Melissa wanted to get the AIG Manchester United jersey but she was worried that it was synthetic goods since they are going at such low prices. The auction was like visiting a flea market okay.

Then after dismissal, Amelia and Cheryl went over to Melissa's house to play Nintendo DS and barbecue marshmellow. Didn't go cuz of a movie session with jiahao and meiqi. But looks like we are not watching The Simpsons after all.

Shall stop here then. Byes.